There are many setbacks on this little road called life that detour us from our intended path. Shit happens. In the past, when I’ve started on a workout routine, I end up experiencing and injury or temporary illness that I not only give in to, but end up giving up from. How stupid is that? I pinched a nerve in my neck with my last trainer, who was pushing me a little too hard so I broke up with him and quit altogether. Prior to that, I got pneumonia (which happens every couple of years for me) so after being out over a month to recover, I never found my way back to the gym. One excuse after another kept me from a consistent weekly trip to yoga, which I love, love, love. As I continue to face the nasty habits I have in my life for myself, I see clearly that these were choices that I liked to explain away one excuse after another of why those were good choices at those particular times. Bullshit! Yep, I am calling complete BS on myself!
Although I’m beginning to see the sabotages I have created for myself, I’m still working through the rubble to get to the root of why I can’t seem to make ME important in my daily life necessities. Of all the balls I juggle every day that linger in their perfect positions every day, the “Mo Needs” ball never makes it into alignment with the rest.
The change begins now. After nursing a 2 week ankle injury, I am now in bed with something resembling bronchitis grown from strep throat earlier in the week. Okay, as a part of the MOVEMENT, I know I have to rest and allow my weak ass lungs to heal as the virus takes its course. My initial response is to be pissed off and frustrated. This is a typical reflect reaction and why? Can’t control this and frankly being irritated only makes me irritable, which I already am. Did I mention, The change begins now! I’m going to take advantage of this resting time and take a nice warm bubble bath and practice my quiet time with myself. Spiritually I am in a pretty good place, so this is a perfect time to put it to good use and “mother” myself through begin sick. Frustration, irritation and chocolate pudding serve their purpose, but misplaced emotion and comfort food will not a healthy girl make!! Oh right, and maybe a quick clinic visit would be good, but I will talk to myself about that in the tub!
The process through this will be fundamentally necessary in order to approach working out with strength and perseverance again; this is very clear to me. I’m okay with a delay because it IS different. Even though my physical self is sick and suffering, my mental state is clear and full of hope. There’s no giving up. There’s no giving in. There’s only healing and I can still do that in all sorts of ways, even laid up with a virus! Although I do have cough meds with codeine, so there will be some serious comatose Zzzzzzz’s tonight. Sweet Dreams Peoples, and steer clear of the viral spring funk that’s blowing around!! *hugs* M